Friday, August 29, 2008

august 29: cleaning house

i've been off-blog for a few days. lots of raw fu stuff going on, and just finding it hard to find the time, finding it hard to have much to say here after being on the forums for hours over on raw fu. what else is there to say?

first, to catch up - i DID have my colonic, and i'm feeling much better about it. i'm very glad i did it. the blockage in my sigmoid colon is gone and while i'm still having some residual gas, that is also improving and i'm feeling much better. i've altered my protocol slightly in terms of what i'm eating and some of my dental care, so i'm going to blog about that today.

the colon hydrotherapist of course told me to cut back on the sweet fruits and to include more "heat" in my diet and lifestyle, as i'm "damp." ugh. whatever. TCM to me is so full of flaws. i'm in a hot room for 5 hours a day and i get sun exposure to my belly every day and i never spend any time in AC below 80 degrees. that's enough heat for one lifestyle, i think. she also wants me to eat more proteins and more fats to "counteract" candida. not that she noticed any candida during my treatment. i don't think i have a problem with candida anymore. and, i beleive dr. doug, that candida is caused by excess fat, not sugar. what she did say was that she was seeing a lot of undigested food. that, i'll buy. while i've been chewing my greens very well, i tend to inhale my fruit. so i'm back to smoothies. primarily watermelon for now. mono-fruit smoothies all day. that's protocol change #1.

i'm still wadging, but i've moved it now to the end of the day instead of early or whenever i'm in the car. my goal is to wadge 2 whole romaine hearts each day. i like romaine for wadging better than baby spinach. protocol change #2.

i'm having my tahini. i did an exhaustive nutridiary consult and my calories are remaining in the 6% range from fat, and that's including my tablespoon of tahini each day. as long as i feel like my body wants it, i'm going to have it. and i know the difference between a body desire and an addiction. the body desire is very clear and knows exactly when to stop, the addiction keeps going long after the body is satisfied. the addiction is never satisfied. one thing that the therapist suggested that resonated in my body was to add some spirulina just to get some extra amino acids to help support my liver. i let that suggestion move through my body and i found that it really resonated, so i've been doing that the past nights - adding 1/2 tsp to my 1 tbsp of tahini, with a dash of cayenne pepper (for heat). that's protocol change #3.

i've started oil pulling in the mornings as part of my dental protocol. i've read good things about it, and my teeth and gums need extra support which they aren't getting from just sweet fruit. of course, minor miniscule amounts of the oil are being absorbed while i'm oil pulling, and i'm ok with that. most of it gets spit out. that's protocol change #4.

so far, i'm noticing good benefits from all of these changes. my teeth are responding well to the oil pulling. my gums are responding very well. my plan is to continue doing it until i'm finished with all of my fillings, and then hopefully my mouth will be healthy enough to carry on with water and flossing. my mouth is also responding well to the wadging, and oddly enough, to the smoothie! i swish it around and it feels really good. my digestion has become much less gassy - still a little, but nowhere near as much. overall, i'm happy with this protocol, and i don't need anyone to tell me that the spirulina and the oil pulling aren't in alignment with 811. i know that. it's called a TRANSITION. and to me, it feels very beneficial. when it is time to change it, i'll know.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

august 26: catching up

a smidge of good news (well, it's all good, but i really dig this particular bit!) today is the 2nd day in a row that i've just woken up a little after 6am on my own, no alarm. this has been such a goal of mine, to be able to wake up early. last night, i crashed out at 10pm, so that's another 8 hour sleeping gig, but it got me up at 6, so i'm happy!!

what i'm not so terribly happy about is this terrible gas pain i'm feeling. i feel like i have a blockage in my descending colon. it's old, old stuff, and the blockage that i can feel has been in this spot for about a week or maybe longer, i can just feel it now. i feel like nothing can get past it unless it is squeezed past, and it's creating a back up and lots of gas. i have gas pains in my left leg - when i wake up, that's actually what's waking me up, not the pleasantest, and i'm not eliminating the way i want to be. i keep hoping it's going to take care of itself, and now i think i'm going to have to go for a colonic. not that i mind, i enjoy them, but i was hoping i could do it on my own! i think its just too big. it needs to be broken up. i'm going to call brenda first thing this morning.

i'm working on my teeth now. that's the next frontier. i have a laundry list of tooth problems, and while i've had some success in improving them on 811, i confess that those improvements have been short-lived. they haven't gotten worse on 811, just not better, and i want better. i've started eating greens again, with a technique called "wadging," in which you chew and chew and chew a mouthful of greens and swallow the liquid but not the fiber. so far i've been wadging baby spinach, which doesn't leave a whole lot of fiber to spit out, so i've been swallowing that, but i think that's the best way to eat tougher greens like kale. it's similar to making a green smoothie, just blending it in the mouth. you're supposed to chew your green smoothie to mix up the saliva and start the digestion in the mouth, which i never do, but wadging! i'm chewing each mouthful around 300 times. the benefits of this is getting the chlorophyll of the greens in the mouth, very healing, keeping it there! and the fiber in the greens cleans the teeth without scrubbing and massages the gums, and the chewing itself strengthens the gums and tooth roots. in the 2 days i've been doing it, i've seen immediate improvements in my mouth - gums not bleeding, less sensitive, teeth less sensitive. my mouth this morning is a little cottony, but it doesn't have that stagnant feeling. i feel almost kissable! i've made an appointment - 2 of em - for september to get my teeth cleaned and prepped for having my mercury amalgam fillings out. because my teeth and gums are SOOOOO sensitive, i've been really dreading the procedure. plus, my dentists are clients of mine, so i don't want to go in there a mess! i want to go in there with a strong, healthy mouth. can a month of wadging bring about a miracle? that's my hope. i care less about their professional opinion than i do about being able to tolerate the procedure. and i also want to get to a point where they aren't going to be tempted to suggest a DIFFERENT procedure beforehand, because that's what happened to me last time. i went in for a cleaning and consult to get my fillings out, and ended up getting a periodontal scaling that i don't think helped anything. so this time, i want to be able to confidently say, "i know my gums aren't perfect, but they're getting better. take the fillings out, let me do what i'm doing, and once all the fillings are out and i've had 6 months to heal, if the gums are still bad, then we'll fix them." i think taking the fillings out is going to make all the difference in the world. i think it's going to improve my eyesight. i'm going to wadge with cilantro as my chelation protocol. now i just have to figure out how i'm going to pay for all this. i don't want it to take 3 years! either the payment or the filling removal.

in the meantime, all is well. the reintroduction of greens is helping my mouth, but not my gut, so i'm going to give my gut a helping hand. i've decided, also, not to fight the tahini - you can't fight the tahini! it's such a calcium-rich food, i'm going to use it on a daily basis in addition to the wadging to help increase the bone density in my jaw and hopefully reset this wiggly tooth. i'm brushing with a rotation of plain water, H2O2, and IPSAB tooth powder. i also have some "tooth soap" that i might try to use again. i've tried so many different products on my teeth. sigh. i hope the wadging works. i hope getting the fillings out works.

it's not such a big topic out there in the raw world. we talk more about colons than mouths. we talk about eating, but it's almost like the mouth is treated as the pleasure center, it's just there, and then we're fascinated by what goes on in the murky depths that we can't see. so i'm on a campaign to talk about the mouth. my mouth needs help! (it needs kisses too! perhaps more of those are on the way???)

Sunday, August 24, 2008

august 24: no poo update

i just spent the weekend at the beach, of course, i got in the pool, of course, and spent a lot of time outside, of course. on no poo, my hair is soft and shiny and feels really good, and looks really wild, which is how i like it best. i was just sitting here playing with it, and i noticed: it doesn't have that "hair" smell. it smells good.

it's been really nice not to shampoo my hair. it's not oily at all. the first couple of weeks, it got oily, but not any more. it's just really nice. i'm sold!

august 24: i'm back!

i lost battery power on the computer while at the beach, and i have a very finicky plug, which only likes to work at home, when the stereo cord is lovingly holding it in place. my laptop is getting old, and planned obsolescence is calling for its imminent demise. so i spent a whole lotta time vlogging. it was lots of fun. i don't have the embed code to post the vids here, and i've given the camera back to Wayne. until i have a new computer with a webcam, i think videos may be few and far between, since i'm relying on Wayne to upload them for me! he's patient and loving, AND, that may be asking too much.

and my internet at home was being infuriatingly slow last night, so i gave up. and tonight, i came to the coffee house. it's gloriously perfect weather right now - breezy, cool enough for jeans, warm enough for sleeveless, so i'm thankful to not be stuck inside my house. i may do this more often.

tonight i had a little brush with The Real World. i have a friend and client who i am now working with on some nutritional coaching. i'm so used to being in my raw fu bubble, and my yoga bubble, and my own self-bubble bubble, i forget how most of the real world lives and eats and functions. my friend, i must say, is doing really, really well for doing a SAD lifestyle, and i commend her for her efforts. but it baffles and staggers me how different my lifestyle is now, and how easy it is for me, and how impossibly hard and disciplined it must seem to her! i'm not trying to convert her to 811rv, trust me. i want to help her reach her goals, not mine. the only thing i'm doing to approximate that is i'm asking her, as i'm going to ask all of my clients, to simply do as much fruit as they want, and only fruit, before noon. after that, then we can start to talk about other things. what struck me is how health conscious my friend is. she is eating cereal, fruit and yogurt for breakfast, and is very concerned with calcium, electrolytes, iron, and is convinced that she needs grains. when i asked her to give up her cereal and yogurt, her first concern was "where will i get my grains?" so i suggested brown rice for dinner. too much work. you know what that says to me? she doesn't feel a physical need for grains. if she did, she would have said, "oh, absolutely!" convenience is a major issue for her. i wish she could see how simple my life is. how totally convenient.

and it makes me really sad, SAD does. it's not working for her. she's got osteopenea, acid reflux, and a huge lower pot belly. she's smart, savvy, and relatively open minded, but also been fed a huge amount of rhetoric. when she was worried about her grains, i said, "if there was such a thing as a grain deficiency, i'd be incredibly sick right now!"

getting beyond the convenience is going to be the trick. her husband works for burger king corporate. and he doesn't dance. i could never marry such a man.

my nice new friend has been calling, though he hasn't been PURSUING. damn. i want to be pursued. like crazy. but we've had some nice long conversations, and he's just my type. only nicer, i think. am i his type? or am i too weird, too boring? i'll go ahead and say it - i hope i'm his type. i hope he likes me.

other than that, life continues to be great. i'm so happy. i don't need him to like me, that would just be a nice perk.

Friday, August 22, 2008

august 22: il pleut

here i am in beautiful corpus christi texas, and my friends, it is RAINING!!! it's so beautiful, so perfect! it's raining and thundering and just wild and wonderful. i'm in my hotel and watching the rain and enjoying the pants off myself!! it's great. there's always a lull between storms, and then it picks back up again. but i might just get out there in a few minutes anyway just to enjoy the rain! it's been such a hot, dry summer, hot and dry since may, that i am really tickled by it raining on my mini-break vacation trip to the beach. i honestly can't think of a more perfect way to spend the day.

do i sound facetious? i hope not! i'm absolutely serious. i'm so happy right now. it's like, nothing can make me not happy.

i've had such a nice day. the drive down was awesome. i took the backroads, and for most of the trip, i was pretty much alone, so i could drive as fast or as slow as i wanted to. the skies were beautiful, we had one rainstorm, i stopped at a picnic area and took a video and saw some longhorn steers - that was very cool. i crack myself up listening to the video, because i talk to this 1000+ pound huge beast as if it were a kitten, "hi mr longhorn, aren't you a handsome beasty!" etc. super-dork! it was just really mellow, a great trip. i've had coconuts and bananas and mangos, as planned (although, the last one i had is giving me a little irritation around my mouth. hmmm)

it's just great to be here! i'm really happy right now.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

august 21: vlogging begins!

i borrowed a camera and started vlogging! that was last night's entertainment. tonight's i didn't like so much, i look as tired as i feel! and tomorrow morning i'm up bright and early to head down to corpus christi to spend a couple of days at the beach! that's exciting. i'm going to do a separate vlog to post on the blog as opposed to what i'll post on raw fu, just for those random few people who have the joy of watching both! vlogging is fun.

tonight, i'm really tired and still have all those last-minute pre-trip things to do, so i'm not going to write much. but i'll catch you tomorrow from the hotel, on the BEACH!!! yippee!!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

august 19: raw fu like crazy person

wow - our 2nd mini-challenge is over tomorrow! wow! 20 days! 39 days for me. i'm proud of myself.

i have spent the whole evening geeking out on raw fu. like crazy person! so much to say, lots of comments to make and share. geek night.

and then i get here and blammo. nada. i got the nicest comment though today from one of the raw fu-ers who actually is reading this blog and thanked me for writing so much! lol! i'm such a big mouth, and someone is actually happy about it! thank you missvanilla! that means so much to me. it means a lot that someone is reading, it means a lot that any of this can be helpful to someone else.

there was a headline in The Onion the other day "Local Idiot Posts Opinion on Internet." a lot of times, that's how i feel, too! i don't have a sexy blog full of pictures and video - have no cameras - and i've spent no time trying to figure out how to make blogger look good. so this is just what it is. me posting my experiences.

part of 811 is teaching yourself how to eat a lot of fruit. and i do mean A LOT. i'm getting better at it. dr. doug says that cooked food eaters' stomachs are constricted and small, only really able to hold a very small amount of food, because cooked food is so concentrated and low in water. it's their bowels and livers that are bloated and enormous, not the stomachs. i'm not sure how this works with "stomach stapling," making the stomach even smaller, but god, what a horrible idea. so in order to eat your calories from fruit, which is full of water, you have to gently stretch the stomach in order to accomodate. wacky, right? but you know, it's working. i'm eating a lot more in one sitting than i ever would have dreamed possible, and i'm pretty comfortable afterwards. my energy, great. it's all good.

and oh, now i feel that lovely sinking feeling that is my body telling me that i have about 7.25 minutes before it's going to crash on the bed! i love how clear my body is with its messages.

Monday, August 18, 2008

august 18: a damn good question

i got an email this morning from a friend of mine. she's totally awesome and very very cool. she's trying to kick it into raw, joined raw fu, and is struggling. so here's what she wrote:

I'm really enjoying living vicariously through your blog. I,myself,
am having a little difficulty staying raw. I have not gone back into
the land of meat but cheese & fats have been my undoing. So after
eating, drinking & smoking everything I could get my hands on this
weekend, where do I start? I keep making deals with myself like
"Well as soon as I get ___________________________________________
I'll be start". Etc. What motivates you? I get discouraged easily
(my clothes are actually TIGHTER!). My battle is clearly mental. My
body doesn't want crap but my mind does. What's a girl to do? :-)

god, what an amazing question. WHAT MOTIVATES YOU? i posted this as a discussion thread on raw fu, and i'm putting it here as well, so anyone catching this post, please feel free to leave a comment that i can pass along to my friend. where do you start? what motivates you? what IS a girl to do?

i guess the only place TO start is at the beginning. i don't mean that to sound flip. my own beginning. way back in the day. i was introduced to raw food by one of my yoga students. she was brimful of energy and crazy as a loon. she loaned me david wolfe's "sunfood diet success system" and took me to see him in greensboro, and that was it for me. i was sold. but why? what motivated me to even start?

it was just the ring of truth. i knew that i had found the missing element of truth that all of my dieting and health seeking had missed out on over the years.

but i fell off the wagon so many times. i struggled so much. as i've written here, i've struggled with peer pressure and wanting to be "date-able" and i've really battled my addictions. what has motivated me to climb back up on that wagon, time after time, and what's motivating me to stay there this time?

lousy as this is going to sound, i don't know. i don't have a good answer for this amazing question. i feel like i'm almost BEYOND motivation. i'm in the realm of choicelessness, where motivation is just a pale spectre in the distance. but that's not fair to say. this is a tough one!!!

ok. 6 weeks ago, i was at the end of my rope with myself. i was feeling fat and disgusting and ridiculous. i was watching tv all day, eating tons of junk food (and i do mean junk! potato chips, corn chips, sun chips, bread, olives, coffee, peanut butter, cereal, burritos, etc.), i had only enough motivation to get me to go to work, teach my classes, and go back to the house, let the dogs out and watch more tv. on the one hand, it was "fun," it felt like summer vacation when i was a kid. on the other hand, i'm not a kid anymore, and living that way was SO FAR OUT of my integrity with who i am now - the last thing i want is for my schedule to be governed by television shows!!! but it was. so how did i pull myself up? i got really sick of myself. i have to work in front of a mirror, wearing pretty much minimal clothing. i couldn't stand the sight of myself. i felt like a junkie, going in to the gas station store to buy potato chips for the drive home, and then another big bag or 2 from the corner grocery once i got home. that's not what i beleive in, that's not my value system. i had to kick myself in the ass. i had to get back to my roots.

so i sent out an email to all my friends, telling them that i was re-committing myself to raw food, and asking them to do whatever they needed to do in order to support me in my commitment. the next day, i found raw fu, and the day after that, i started this blog. 10 days later, i found 80-10-10. what motivated me was the shining burning flame of self-love flickering dimly through the dense fog of self-hatred and addiction. what has kept me motivated is the accountability and the support and real love that i've felt from the raw fu community and the open window of self-expression i've gotten in the blog. and what's taken me beyond the need of motivation is this amazing 811 way of eating, which is doing everything for me that i need it to do.

and, i'm lucky. i'm not married, i don't have kids, i don't have a cadre of friends who also drink and eat merry and who are going to either goad and tease me to my face, or gossip behind my back. my friend DOES. i may not have "support," but i don't have counter-support. she's pulling her own boat against a very strong current. and she's got the guts and the cojones and the good, strong Aquarian individuality to do it - she's just got to learn to strengthen all those muscles.

it took me 3 years of not drinking before i could go hang out in a bar. i quit drinking while all my friends were still drinking. i quit smoking while all my friends were still smoking. i quit cooked food while all my friends were eating cooked food. i started yoga with no friends to speak of and none of my non-yoga friends have EVER taken any of my classes. i've been boyfriendless pretty much the whole time. all of my falling off the wagon was my own damn doing, and all my getting back on was my own doing too. each time i have given up an addiction, i've lost and changed my entire social structure. for the better, to be sure! but that's more than what most people are ready for. i've been painfully lonely. i've fallen off the wagon, believing the illusion and the lie that eating "normal" could make me "normal." instead, it made me fatter, lonelier and more miserable, because i wasn't with ME! if i'm not with me, i'm over there trying to be like them, and they aren't with me, then no one is. i have to be with me. i have to stay true to myself. i have to stay true within myself. the reward for that is that i'm not lonely anymore. i like myself. i even love myself. i've found my true love, my life's companion, and that's me! the personality that is my soul's partner for this lifetime. that's what motivates me. that's what keeps me going. the joy of being in love with myself.

when i love myself this much, there is no option for putting poisons in, on, or around my body. when i love myself this much, it doesn't MATTER what anybody else is doing! this new guy i met, he ate ham and eggs for brunch yesterday, and while he told me he doesn't do that in his normal life (party party weekend!), i didn't care. his life. what he and everyone else choose to do doesn't affect me. my body, my life, my choices. took me a long time to get here. but damn, it's a great place to be!

Sunday, August 17, 2008

august 17: big sigh of contentment

i'm eating a huge amount of watermelon. right now. it's so good. sometimes i don't want it, and when i do, it's the most amazing thing. totally light yet absolutely satisfying and filling. i've had about half, or maybe more, of a huge seeded watermelon this evening. nice big watermelon belly. feels good.

and i'm already looking forward to tomorrow morning's banana-berry-blast! isn't that amazing. no sense of deprivation. none.

i had a great experience of joining in with the whole party scene for brunch this afternoon. they all had eggs. or pancakes. or eggs with pancakes. and sausage, ham, bacon, the whole 9. i had a bowl of fruit. it wasn't, at all, a great bowl of fruit. but it was a bowl of fruit that i didn't have to special order or beg for or explain! it was just a bowl of fruit! isn't that great? i felt so normal, having brunch with friends.

of course, it's impossible to have a meal with friends without explaining the way i eat, and these were new friends, so they aren't used to me, so they had lots of questions. jade was on the other end of the table, so she wasn't there to jump in for me, and she also didn't see what i was eating, i don't think. she didn't give me the old hostess' "are you ok with that? is that enough?" she just smooched on her handsome new husband and he on her and they are so adorable i can hardly stand it. but my new friend ("friend???") asked me some good questions and WASN'T PUT OFF!! at least, not so far as i could tell, he may have been putting on a brave face. he seemed thoughtful and said that i had given him a lot to think about. that i will take!

a most excellent weekend. i've had so much energy today. i feel so good. and now i might have a new friend, too! this 811 stuff works!

Saturday, August 16, 2008

august 16: saturday morning

miracle of miracles!!! the storms we had yesterday are JUST THE BEGINNING!!! a cool front blowing through, lots of rain on the way, and HIGHS IN THE 80'S!!!!!!!! we haven't seen that since may. people are going to be dancing in the streets. last night, it was so nice and cool, i slept with the windows open and the AC off for the first time in a long time, and i was almost too cool. glorious. i wouldn't cry if it didn't get above 100 again this summer. as in the entire month of september.

i had fun at the cupcake party. we all went to town on making some crazy cupcakes. i didn't eat any or lick my fingers, wasn't even tempted. i was holding them, and i didn't feel like they were food. just some fun wee art project.

my friend trishie is a precious sweetheart, and thinking of me, she bought this yummy delicious raw spinach dip and raw pumpkin seed cheese with a platter of veggies from the raw bar at whole foods. so nice. so overt fat. but i ate em! i sat in that chair and ate those dips and talked to a very nice attractive man in town for the party from dallas. i wish she had provided fruit instead, but who am i? i didn't bring fruit - i just spent $111 and didn't bring any fruit to share! schmuck. so what's a little overt fat when talking to a new attractive man?

i do feel sluggish still this morning, and my nose is runny still from last night. i'm going to attempt to jog, but i feel like it's going to be a slog. at least it's not blazing hot out!

Friday, August 15, 2008

august 15: friday!

a really nice day. i woke up super-duper late - 9:30!!! - and my friend ron was coming over so i had to hustle to tidy up and take a shower and still get my smoothie and still do my rawfu and email. it was the first time he was at my house since i "finished" fixing it up (still lots to do, but i'm bizzy! i'm rawfuing!), and he said, "wow -it looks like a Style Bomb went off in here!" i loved that. i gave him a look that said, "style bomb - that would be me." we hung out in my casita for a mo' and then headed down to the daily juice and i had a nana smoothie with coco water. truly delish, but i gotta put the kibosh on the cocos. no more for awhile. time for truly, absolutely no overts. we were hanging out outside the 'juice, when this guy - not homeless, just a barton springs road pothead, keepin' austin weird for the rest of us - came up and said, "hey buddy, wanna buy a knife here for your girlfriend?" ok! like, i'm not ron's girlfriend. he had his chance and turned me down. but hey buddy wanna buy a knife for your girlfriend??? i love weird people. his sales pitch, to me, was that i could use that knife to protect myself against HIM. the salesman, the weird austin pothead. in case he, you know, attacked me, i could cut him with it cuz its a good knife! so my boyfriend, aka ron, should buy it for me. my first thought was, hey, maybe you shouldn't attack me? but i didn't say that. just kept saying no thanks until he walked away. then i turned to ron and said, "damn it, don't you want to buy me a knife?" to which he replied, "well, i'm looking at another one that i like a lot better..." love ron. he's, literally, a hoot.

so we were hanging out, he had to go to a meeting, i wanted to go to the pool and get my sunshine on, but it was cloudy and thick and humid, so i went to the coffeehouse next door to go to the bathroom, and the minute i stepped under the awning WHOOSH the heavens opened and the rains poured down! so i hung out at the coffeehouse and then went downstairs to the clothing store and bought an adorable bag i've been looking at for months and a cool new pair of shades and an awesome green dress and pink earrings to wear to my friend jade's wedding party tomorrow - she got married in FL a few weeks ago, this is her austin wedding party. in a minute, i'm heading over to my friend trishie's house to help her and jaimejo ( make cupcakes for the party. in other words, a lesson in how not to lick ones fingers.

i did make it to the pool, eventually, and the oddest thing happened. while sitting at the 'juice with ron, this little tiny bee was hovering and floating around me and even crawled on my fingers. i asked it to go somewhere else, and it did. but would you know it followed me to barton springs pool! i was debating whether it was time to go or not, and i felt a fly on the back of my neck, so i swatted at it, and damn it! damn it! damn it! it was the BEE!! so it stung me, right where i couldn't catch it. i hopped around for a minute and the lady next to me was kind enough to pull the stinger out. poor bee. the weirdest thing tho - or the coolest - is that it only stung a little once the stinger was gone, and then a few minutes later i rubbed it and the scab came off, and now, 3 hours later, there's no irritation, no welt, no indication it even happened. how's THAT for an immune system?

i spent $111 on fruit at whole foods. couldn't help myself. i'm not sure what was the most expensive part, but it was all so yummy, i just couldn't refuse any of it. for dinner i had a ripe mango for appetizer, followed by a gorgeous salad of 1 pint blackberries, 1 pint raspberries, and 1 pint strawberries. yum yumyumyummnomnomnomnom yum yum....

hooray for 811! today i've had a nana-fig smoothie, a nana-coco smoothie, a big bunch of grapes, and a big bowl of berries and a really beautiful mango.

life is really good.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

august 13: hitting the reset button

i'm starting to feel a little bit more reconnected now! i spent the morning cleaning house and although i still have dishes to do, the laundry's been put away and i've tidied up a bit, so i feel like it's ok to blog a bit!

i threw my back out somehow over the past 3 days - this happens every 3-5 months or so, just the leftover imbalances from misalignments in my hips/sacrum. it's not too bad this time, although sleeping last night was interesting, as it always is when this happens, because i have to wake up a little in order to roll over carefully. but i feel like it's untweaking itself on its own this morning, just from moving around, which is awesome, as it usually takes me at least 3-4 days and a massage or 3 to work the kinks out. i'm hoping that over time, my yoga practice and raw food diet will work together to correct the misalignment! that's my hope.

yesterday i met with a guy who's doing an "observational film" about people eating. i decided to do the project - anytime in front of a camera! - which will involve me going somewhere, spending $20 on food, and then eating it. and then sharing my thoughts i was having while eating. could be interesting, but no harm in trying!

i had more overt fats yesterday than i've had in quite awhile, and while they tasted good, it wasn't the greatest moment ever - i prefer my mangos! so i've decided to go absolutely no overts again. my spoonful of tahini every day has just turned into a bad habit, and i don't need it. and for the next 3 days, i'm also going just fruits, no veg, in hopes that my digestion will improve as a result. apparently, that's dr. doug's recommendation for people with IBS, colitis, crohn's, etc. for the first 3 weeks, no veg, just fruit! so i'm going to go just fruit and see what happens, and maybe see how long it takes for my digestion to improve. i'm also thinking i need to stop smoothie-ing everything. i love my smoothies for sure, but maybe i need to just simply chew and eat.

i love how simple this whole 811 thing is. eat fruit. chew and eat. don't eat anything that you wouldn't want to sit down and make a whole meal of. it's kind of like perpetual "DUH!" and then, every once in awhile, have some gourmet raw or some nuts or some avocado. but i like, finally, having a daily diet that i can totally live with. there's just no conflict to it, and i can show you 5 1/2 years worth of journals FULL of food conflict on raw, and another 10 years of journals before that on cooked food conflict. i always wanted to be skinny, healthy, and hot. and on a cooked food diet, i was NONE of those things, and working in the fashion industry, that really hit me on a deep level. i had a lot of existential angst about it, honestly! i feel, very strongly, that beauty is our birthright, and that everybody has the potential to be stunningly beautiful. and feeling it so out of my grasp was literally painful. not being able to see my own beauty was agonizing. and i'm not exaggerating, and i'm not shallow or vain.

i honestly beleive that all of our low-self-esteem body images and messages are authentic and accurate. it didn't matter if so-and-so thought i was attractive, or if i ever fit into a specific size. my body image was horrible. my ex, rick, and i used to fight about it all the time. he wanted me to dress "hot." actually, he wanted me to dress "hoochie," which would never fly with me. but he wanted me to look slut-tastic and couldn't understand why in the world i wouldn't dress that way. i guess he thought my body was hot enough, but he was very into these hot wrappers. i, on the other hand, couldn't imagine my body as being appealing or attractive, and wanted to cover it up in a way that was "chic and sophisticated." he thought i looked conservative and boring (and "conservative" is fightin' words, as far as i'm concerned!!). it was such a horrible catch-22, because also in order to look chic, it's very important to be very thin. which i never was. oi, it was a constant battle. i hated it.

and the battle didn't end when we broke up - i've been fighting it on my own for 8 1/2 years since then! i feel like i've maybe, finally, won the war. i look in the mirror, and i like what i see. plenty of room for improvement, but i've only just started eating this way. my mind has changed, though, before my body did. because my body is now happy. it's letting go of old stuff it doesn't need, including this long and arduous battle for sexiness, and it's rebuilding itself in a way that is actually beautiful. yes, i do wish i had a partner in my life who could see what i'm seeing and more, but this is fun for me. i had a blast in whole foods last night - heads were not just turning, but ROCKING! it was so much fun to have attractive men look at me and me not wonder why, but to just smile back. it's pretty awesome.

this journey hasn't been very fun for most of the trip, but if this is the reward, to be here now, and happy?! i'll take my journey. this is worth it, and this is just the beginning of the good stuff.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

august 12: eleven hours

that's right kids, i slept ELEVEN hours last night. it's almost 11pm now, and i'm super tired again. i've spent so much time on rawfu tonight, my house is a DISASTER area, and i'm just tired.

tonight i went to the rawbar at whole foods. i had their hummus wraps in romaine leaves with some pico de gallo, and 2 tiny bites of "cheesecake." and i am bloated like MAD. i haven't had any salt in what, 2 weeks? and all this food had salt in it. my whole body feels huge. note to self: salt = not good. and man, i used to eat that stuff like crazy! good to know.

but that's all i got in me tonight. i'll be back in the mornin, after i clean up my mess and make my house look pretty again.

Monday, August 11, 2008

august 11: lots of good, good stuff

tonight we had our first meeting - our Texas RAWhides Round Up! it was fun! it was so nice to get to meet these people that i've been communicating with and to get to see them in person.

oddly enough, right now i am very very tired. it's only 8:23, so i don't know why i'm so tired, but i honestly feel like i could just crash down in the bed right now. if i trusted myself to get up early enough, i might just do it. the only reason i can think of for being so tired is that i didn't exercise as much today as usual. but i am zonked! my shoulder hurts, too, from being on the computer at my desk. wah wah wah!

i think this is what bunny calls "the whine line."

so i promised lots of good stuff, and now sitting down, i'm just tired. i think that's going to have to wait as well! crazy! maybe a brief nap will take care of me. (like it's ever worked in my whole life!)

Sunday, August 10, 2008

august 10: sweet, simple, easy

everything is now. decisions, sweet, simple, easy. everything. it's so amazing. i have a lot to write about, but i'm learning that i'm not in charge. my body is tired and is going to let me get away with about 5 more minutes of activity before it conks out, so i'm going to sit on these ideas and share them tomorrow. today was a great day. it really was. build up some anticipation so you can't wait to hear about it! tomorrow, my lovelys, tomorrow.

Saturday, August 9, 2008

august 9: no poo part 2 and The Dress!

i non-shampooed my hair again today, just dr. bronner's and vinegar rinse, followed by coconut oil while damp to control the frizzies. my hair's so hot, i want me! i defy anybody to tell me that i need to be shampooing my hair with chemicals. this works. that's all there is to it.

i've been laying out in the sun every day so i went to target and dug through their slim pickin's (so-called end of season. it's HOT here, and will be till october!) and got myself some sexy-hot string bikinis! i actually look almost good in them. there's still a lot of work to be done, but i feel absolutely no body shame anymore. i honestly love my body. my body's so hot, i want me! i defy anybody to tell me that i need to be feeding it protein and fat and supplementing it with chemicals and entertaining it with poisons. this works. that's all there is to it.

so i'm looking through my closet - i'm going to need all new clothes because the ones i have don't reflect this sense of love and attraction i feel for myself. nothing "matches" the way i feel about myself right now. but i dug one of my favorite dresses out (by the way, i have a very small wardrobe) that hasn't fit properly in a long time. i blamed it for shrinking, when in fact i was growing. but i threw that dress on over a skimpy little string bikini bottom, and it fit just fine and now i'm sashaying out the door to go meet my friend for tea! i defy anybody to tell me that getting older means getting old and that i can't wear a short skirt after 35! my body's barely 25, and it's just getting better.

august 9: wow!

i didn't blog yesterday! not even off-line! that's a first. i almost never go a day without doing some sort of journaling, so this is a rather bizarre realization.

what i did do: i spent the morning working on catch-up stuff for the yoga studio (i'm so behind in all my work). i geeked out a little on rawfu. i went to barton springs pool and laid out in the sunshine - i'm getting tan! and my skin is getting so strong - it can handle so much more sun now than it used to! this is very exciting to me. and i went for a few long walks, talked with some friends, got more work done, and went to bed early. it was kind of an awesome day!

so here's the dorky thing i did, which actually didn't turn out so bad a-tall. last month i bought a workout dvd from an infomercial. i confess! i never do that, but i was house-sitting and eating junkfood and watching tv and feeling lonely and horrible about myself, and this one actually seemed not-too-cheesy, so i bought it. and like most purchases of that ilk, it has sat in the box since then! but yesterday i slept in sooooo late (9:00!!! that's unheard of!) it was too late to go for a run (too hot), so i decided, let's put this dvd in and see how embarrassed i am that i bought it. but you know what??? it wasn't cheesy at all! it was actually good! it kicked my butt! today i am SORE! and it was only 10 minutes of cardio, and it totally kicked me. i love that. so now i don't feel quite so stupid.

today is watermelon day. i'm on my 2nd quart of watermelon smooice (or would that be a juithie?) - when you blend watermelon, seeds and all, in a vitamix, you get juithie! all the fiber, all the water, all the everything, but it's more like a juice. tasty goodness. and you've gotta get the seeded melons. seedless watermelons taste like nutrasweet. gross. they have an aftertaste that i cannot handle. this is a big ol' ginormous texas seeded watermelon and it's mighty fine. i think it was Koko the Gorilla who named watermelon "drink fruit." or maybe it was a community of chimps. or both. regardless, we're all on the same page. i was going to mono-melon for a day or 2, but then i went to WF last night, and i just went, well, bananas. i got kale and celery and nanas, as usual, and cherries, maybe my last (sniff!), and they had ORGANIC MANGOS! $1.99 a piece! rock. on. so i got 6. and an organic papaya and some heirloom tomatoes and a bell pepper, so i might make a papaya-tomato-pepper soup for dinner tonight. that sounds yummy.

look at me, i'm talking about food!

and now i'm off to get my sunshine. nothing better.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

august 7: let me tell you about my teeth...

because i know you're really, really interested.

i've always had lousy teeth. i had tons of cavities as a kid, got to spend lots of time in the dentist's chair. and then i had braces - not just braces, but the headgear, this horrible "bite plate," which was this extra thick retainer device i wore along with the braces and headgear - which i had for 2 1/2 years! ugh! then i got the braces off and my damn teeth got themselves right back where they wanted to be and pushed the retainer right out of my mouth. so that was fun.

around 23? 25? my gums started bleeding, which i thought nothing of. no big deal. i've been to the dentist, obviously, during that time, but not often, not having health insurance. so my gums have continued to bleed, but i haven't had any more cavities. my front lower teeth are just a little loose, but they've been about the same "just a little loose" for over 10 years. i drank coffee, a lot, and i smoked for 10 years, so my teeth were also pretty yellow. and they are really, really sensitive. cold foods send me through the roof! my sister can chew ice cubes (she's one of THOSE people), and the thought alone is enough to send shivers up my spine. about 3 years ago, i went to the dentist and they were alarmed enough by the state of my gums to give me a "periodontic scaling" which was horrible and terrible and i honestly think it did more harm than good. before the scaling, my gums bled and my teeth felt fine, after the scaling, my gums bled and my teeth were more sensitive than ever.

i floss. i brush. i do the good oral hygiene thing, although it's always embarrassing whenever i go to the dentist and they talk to me like i don't know about it. my gums just bleed. that's my normal. they've never gotten better, and they've never gotten worse. i just have yellow, crooked (but cute) teeth and bleeding gums and lots of mercury fillings. woo-hoo!

the only thing that has helped my gums has been taking CoQ10 supplements. most CoQ10 is animal derived, so of course that gives me a dilemma, and i'm terrible, horrible about taking pills (goes back to the lazy thing).

ENTER 811. when i first started eating all this sweet fruit, i was really concerned about my teeth, but i decided to trust the process and see what would happen. i've mentioned a couple of times how my teeth are feeling so much less sensitive these days, and that's TRUE! AND! there's another side of the story.

i've stopped using toothpaste. but i'm still brushing, with water, and occasionally with baking soda and H2O2. i'm still flossing.

my teeth, in general, are significantly less sensitive. however, when i eat cold fruit or super-sweet dates, my teeth hurt. very specifically, the teeth with the mercury fillings hurt.

my gums still bleed, a little. but very specifically, my gums around the teeth with the mercury fillings still bleed.

the teeth without fillings are MIRACULOUS. OMG. the gums around them are not bleeding, and not sensitive. there is very little "debris" to floss out. any film on my teeth brushes away easily. they look WHITER. and the loose teeth in front are feeling tighter. how cool is that?

so the problem in my mouth is the mercury, and i am going to get those damn things out. the fillings are old and crumbly anyway, and i think that the sensitivity i'm feeling is actually the fillings' lack of integrity, not a problem with my teeth.

is it possible to re-grow teeth? can my teeth, my living breathing pulsing vibrant gorgeous teeth, heal themselves and prevent me from needing to get more fillings? can i just get temporary fillings and allow my body to fix these holes? if the body can heal broken bones, surely it can heal broken teeth? i'm going to dream about this tonight. i want my teeth to heal themselves.

august 7: when life hands you lemons...

when life hands you lemons, make lemonade! so when life hands you a quart container of young coconut meat, make a coco-nana smoothie! with cacao and maca! because when else is this going to happen? (one of my students gave it to me today! how nice! how yummy!)

so i've been drinking this tasty rich thick shake all day, and it's really nice and i'm really enjoying it, and i can't wait to finish it. it's too complex. the cacao has got me too high. i have no idea if i'll be able to sleep tonight. a 5-ingredient smoothie is just ridiculous to me now. i'm slowly but surely working my way through all the massive amounts of produce i bought this week (crazy shopper!), and there's this HUGE watermelon, just waiting patiently. i can't wait to get through all this other stuff - i've got this coconut-banana-cacao thing to finish, and then the rest of the mango-nana from this morning to have tomorrow with the last of the celery, and 3 nanas that won't be good past lunchtime tomorrow. and then - it's watermelon time! i'm going to mono-meal that watermelon until it's good and gone, and i'm gonna eat it all the way down to the green of the rind and i'm gonna make big vats of watermelon juice and it's gonna be goooooooooooo-ooooooood! i can't even begin to describe how good plain plain plain watermelon sounds to me right now.

i'm high as a kite right now. yeesh.

august 6: a day late and a few dollars short

i actually WROTE this post yesterday morning while i was doing my laundry, and only got around to posting it right. NOW.

august 6: no ‘poo rawks!!

so i’ve been going the “no ‘poo” route for the past few weeks – no, i’ve been POO-ing, i haven’t been ‘pooing! no shampoo, that is! lol! it’s been a rawfu topic of discussion, and sarah has been no’poo for a long time, and i’ve never been a big fan of washing my hair a lot. my hair, for 1, is super, super thick. crazy thick. so to wash it takes a long time, to dry it takes a long time, and in case i haven’t mentioned it enough here, i’m pretty lazy. i want to look hot, but i don’t want to have to work too hard for it! besides, i prefer my hair when it’s a little dirty/messy, because it’s got a lot of texture and wave and craziness when i let it. when it’s too clean, it always feels like it belongs on someone else’s head. so for the past 2 weeks or so, i’ve been rinsing it whenever i get the chance, and i’ve been getting so many compliments on my hair! my dirty hair. and i’ve really been enjoying it, but i decided that yesterday was time to get the grease out and give it a wash. but no ‘poo!

so i just used a little dr. bronner’s lavendar liquid soap, lots of water, a good scalp scrub, and then – the magic potion! 1 tablespoon of apple cider vinegar diluted in 6 oz of distilled water. poured that all over my wet hair and massaged it in good. wacky! the dr. bronner’s got the oil out, but my hair was tangley and hard to work through. the vinegar just whoosh, wiped out all the tangles. i rinsed out the vinegar solution, wrapped my hair up in a towel turban, and did a honey mask (raw honey, smear on your face, leave it until it starts to tingle. your skin will GLOW!). i went to bed with my hair still damp, all scrunched up, because my hair likes that, and then, when i woke up this morning...

i had perfect hot-n-sexy bed head! OMG. my hair is soft and shiny and full of wave and texture. it feels soft and clean, not stripped and squeaky clean. it looks like it’s been pumped full of pheromones. this is some sexy sexy hair. a little coconut oil to tame the frizzies, and i was out the door. yowza. i’m SOLD on the vinegar rinse. cheap, too. with hair like this, i’m going to be hard-pressed to put it up in a knot.

i realized last night that i’m not really talking about what i’m eating, and this is supposed to be a raw food blog. and i think that’s because my food, while delicious and yummy and totally satisfying to me, has kind of faded into the background, where i think it should be. i don’t feel obsessed about food. i eat lots and lots of sweet fruit, and i don’t have any temptations that don’t involve sweet fruit. i make most of my food into smoothies, and i am powerless to walk by the cherry display without buying a bag and eating it on the way home. i haven’t been getting quite enough greens lately, but i don’t feel the lack of them yet. i’ll get some kale tonight. i did have another small spoon of tahini last night, but i don’t think that’s a bad thing, it’s just not quite on the “no overt fats for 40 days” plan. this morning i’m drinking a mango and banana smoothie, and i love it, and the next time i make one, i will switch the ratio of mango to banana. i did 4 nanas to 2 mangos, and while it tastes like delicious sweet fruitiness, it doesn’t taste like either a mango or a banana. next time, more mango!

i had a really sweet run this morning. it felt nice. i wasn’t able to do quite as much as i wanted, but for right now, i’m not trying to push myself, but rather to do exactly as much as i feel like. what’s wonderful and amazing to me is that i’ve been trying to get myself into a running habit for years. years. ever since i ran my first marathon, after which i gave up running. i would try to incorporate it back into my yoga practice, but it never stuck. it always felt like work, and i didn’t really have the energy to do much exercise beyond my yoga and taking really long walks and the occasional strength training session. what i’m feeling now, though, is totally different. while i still struggle to wake up as early as i want to, when i do wake up, i BOUNCE out and throw on my running shoes. i WANT to get out there on the trail and move! it’s not a matter of “have to” now, it’s a matter of man, i totally WANT to!! i want to do my yoga practice, i want to do my runs, and i want to do my walks! i want to do it all! and i really want to amp up my yoga practice, which i know is coming very very soon. i think my yoga practice is about to undergo a radical transformation. in fact, i know it is. i’m looking forward to it.

other things i’m noticing. i’m still detoxing a little through my skin, just a few bumps here and there, but i’m kind of golden! i’m kind of tan! how fun is that??? my nails are hard as rocks, no cracking, no peeling, no flaking off. my 2 big toenails have had a growth pattern for a long time in which they were flaking and breaking, and now, i can’t even try to get them to do that! that’s cool. the backs of my arms are still really smooth and nice. i’ll be happy to see my cellulite diminishing, but i feel less self-conscious about it, and that’s good. and here’s a very cool thing: my whole life, i’ve had hangnails. i remember being very very little, like 4 or 5 years old, and learning that they were caused by a nutritional deficiency. don’t ask how, i don’t remember. but i do remember thinking, “wow, do i have a nutritional deficiency? how is that possible?” so i just checked all my cuticles, would you know – i don’t have a single hangnail! i don’t even have a little tag that i could pull off to create one! ok, one. i found one. and it’s tiny. this is really major for me, although i know it doesn’t sound like a big deal. it’s the little things that we take for granted on a SAD lifestyle that start to correct themselves when we eat proper food for our monkey.

99% of our woes – not just the big things, like cancer and diabetes and heart disease – but the little things as well, like hangnails and soft nails and dandruff and acne and dry skin and tooth problems and cellulite and allergies and those “last 10 pounds” and hangovers and depression and food cravings and lethargy and low sex drive and rough bumpy skin and eczema! all these things and more, directly related to nutritional deficiencies. and i think we know that, because we try to fortify ourselves with vitamins and minerals and supplements, and we use lotions and creams and potions and powders – we are constantly putting stuff in our bodies to attempt to make up for the nutritional deficiencies, and then our media and sciences tell us that food can’t do it for us, only chemicals can. what folly! what foolishness. if ingesting a pill can have an effect on you, then surely ingesting a food can have an effect on you. if a food is other than whole and raw, it’s degraded, and if it can’t be eaten whole and raw, it’s not a food.

i think i’m done with sprouting. i think i’m done, forever, with dehydrating. i’m feeling pretty done with commercial, pre-shelled nuts, though i am looking forward to cracking pecans once the weather cools down. i’m feeling very done with complex recipes. i think i’m done with superfoods. i think i’m done with cacao. i think i’m done with agave.

oh yeah! i want to talk about my teeth! my gums are getting so strong, my teeth are so much less sensitive, and you wanna know what? i’ve stopped using toothpaste! i’ve stopped using almost everything. and my teeth feel great and i don’t think my breath smells bad. i brush with water, and i chew my myo-munchie with a little food-grade H2O2 sprayed on it. it’s working!! it’s all WORKING. even teeth are more influenced by what you put in them than by what you put on them!

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

august 5: 24 hours to heal

i felt groggy and loopy and spacey and out-of-whack for 24 hours. i came home this afternoon, geeked out on rawfu for awhile, and then simply got up, turned around, and crashed down on the bed. i was immobilized for an hour. completely wiped out asleep. and then almost exactly an hour later, i spontaneously sat up, went to the bathroom, and continued my day as if nothing had happened out of the ordinary! my head and my energy are back in place, and i do still have a sore bump on my head, but it's not a big deal. it feels kind of like what one of those big, cystic, painful pimples feels like before it forms a head, except without that deep infection brewing beneath it.

all in all, i have to say that speaks really, really well for the 811 experiment. i'm obviously getting plenty of vitamin C, because i don't even have a bruise! my muscles in my back and neck were sore and tingly today, but that's gone now too.

so now i'm gonna talk about gas. i'm talking about gas because i'm experiencing gas, and honestly, that is the ONLY drawback i'm having to this whole thing. granted, my digestion has been gassy for most of my memory, so this isn't anything new, i guess i was just hoping that this would FIX THAT!! lol!! it's so annoying! i feel confident it will get better, i just hope its sooner, not later.

august 5: day 5

yesterday i got hit on the head. i was demonstrating a posture to one of my students in the lobby of the yoga studio, which is undergoing renovation/expansion. the workers are, of course, not supposed to be working on the lobby when there are people in the lobby, but i'm not "allowed" to ask them to stop, and they had a miscommunication from their foreman. anyway. we are removing all the ceiling tiles, no more dropped ceilings and florescent lights, yay!, so that's what the guy was doing. actually, he was installing the drywall up to the deck on the wall next to my front desk, but had removed the ceiling tiles over the desk. so here i was, demonstrating Triangle, of all things, was down in the posture, turned my head up to look up at my hand, and BLAMMO!! one of the metal supporting braces of the ceiling tiles fell and landed exactly on my eyebrow, exactly on the spot where my brother pushed me into the corner of a table when i was 2; i have a scar. thank god it didn't break the skin. thank god it didn't hit me in the eye. if i had to take a piece of metal to the head, this was the best way to do it. we got ice on it right away, so the bump is now minimal, but i felt a little disoriented and got a headache, and my body is sore from falling - i have no idea how i got out of Triangle. one instant i'm stretching my arms apart while in a deep lunge, the next instant i'm crouched on the floor with my hands on my forehead, and i have no idea what kind of movement i made to get there. it was freaky, scary, it hurt like hell, i still have a headache the next morning, i slept deep and weird and struggled to wake up. but the part that hurt the most was wayne, my boss and my friend, who was having a tough day himself, telling me that he "had no sympathy" for me. i'm still struggling with that, more than anything.

so because of all this, last night i had tahini. i felt like i needed it. i had a spoonful, and then decided i was going to make a tahini dressing. granted, i didn't have all the necessary ingredients, but i made do, and what i made wasn't bad, but i took a few tastes and then threw it all away. instead, i just tahini and celery, plain, and that was fine.

my food preferences have gotten so simple. more than 3 ingredients is just way too complex. i like everything pretty much by itself. and i like everything whirled up into a beverage. i can't stand the thought of eating oil, and i used to eat coconut oil straight up! one of my sweet lovely new friends on raw fu offered me a carob-fudge recipe, which was so nice of her, and i had to (i hope!) politely decline. plain dates are as close to fudge as i'm interested now, and i used to live on fudges - concoctions of different superfood powders and nut butters and agave and whatever else, goji berries and cacao nibs, raisins, whatever. that was my food. now, i haven't touched any of my superfoods in 3 weeks.

ironically, if i were to eat cooked food, i would want oily, greasy, heavy fried cooked food. thank god i don't want cooked food! if cooked food is my ex-boyfriend (my new mantra), then my ex-boyfriend was one slicked-back-hair slimeball!

slowly waking up and getting ready to move on. hope this headache goes away. hope i don't have a big purple bruise on my face. but if i do, i'll take a picture!

Monday, August 4, 2008

august 4: no clever title

my run this morning felt more like a slog than a jog, so i slowed to a walk and felt better. should have been a rest day, so i'm taking it easy and working from home.

it's been so interesting on raw fu - yesterday was the notorious Day 3, and so many people were really feeling it. grumpy, achy, tired, headaches, irritable, the whole bit. i hope never to get back to that place. in other words, i hope never to fall off this 811 wagon. i love the 811. i'm seeing and feeling results that have never happened this quickly before.

i had so much i was going to write about...

oh yeah. so people are starting to Notice. as in, they walk up to me and say, "you look GREAT! what are you doing?" i had that happen 3 times yesterday. how fun is that? i've got to get to work on my "nutritional coaching" materials and information so i can hang out my shingle and start working with people. i have confidence now that i can do it, because i'm obviously getting results that work. and it's all about the fruit. that's my basic advice to everybody. eat as much fruit for breakfast as you possibly can.

i have a lot i need to get done today. i'm very very behind. off now to a productive Day 4, Raw Fu 100 Day Challenge!!

Sunday, August 3, 2008

august 3: The Shorts

the shorts that haven't fit me all season! woo-hoo!

people are starting to notice. they're starting to ask what i'm doing. it's pretty exciting. i've lost 7 pounds.

and i'm pretty tired, so no long blog tonight. put that hanky away!

Saturday, August 2, 2008

august 2: seriously hot

not just the temps outside, although austin is heading for a record-breaking summer if things don't change soon. we've been above normal since MAY!! baby, that's hot! but you know, you do get used to it. but me (my blog, all about me)!! me, i'm seriously hot! i look so completely different than i did when i took those "before" pictures. i've gotten some sun, so i'm not so blanched, and i've lost weight. it's noticeable. people are starting to talk. and i'm really enjoying the girl in the mirror. it's so much fun when that happens, when the girl in the mirror starts to match the girl in my head. and the really odd thing - maybe i'm just getting used to the pictures, but i'm starting to like the girl in the pictures a lot better. i just noticed that. she's starting to look like somebody else to me now, and i can see where she's cute. it's a very interesting phenom.

i had a really fun day today. my friend marc took me out for my very first ever kayak voyage!! we just floated around on barton creek, and i attempted to paddle. ha! he is a schoolteacher of very small kids, so he was blessedly patient with my feeble attempts. eventually, i gave up and let him do all the work. he was doing it anyway! but it was so nice to just float around in the sunshine after having done my yoga practice. hope to do it again soon!

811 is still going strong. it feels so natural to me already, i don't have much to say about it. i was all liquids today, except for one date, and that worked out just fine. it's simple, it's easy, it makes me happy, what more could there be? the thought that there is more, 'round the bend, more progress, more satisfaction, more ease, is just the nicest thought ever.

august 2: mmm-mmmmm-mmm!!!

i opened my first durian this morning. not first ever, just first recently, and my first non-frozen. mmmmmm. and not even the best ever! some of the texture on this one was a little - crispy? maybe sarah can give me some insight on that. perhaps it wasn't ripe enough, although i was able to open it with my hands after only one small incision. still, so good though. i ate about 4 pods in my favorite way - in my underwear, standing over the kitchen counter! that's how i eat ALL my favorite foods! but then i took most of the rest of it and blended it up with 2 bananas so now i'm having the TRUE breakfast of champions - a durianana smoothie! yummy!

and i earned it, too, on my longest run so far! more than twice as far as the last time i was out, and towards the end of my park trail, there was some big guy huffing and puffing to get past me, and i just turned the motor on and kept him on my tail! yippee!!

day 2 is off to a brilliant start!

Friday, August 1, 2008

august 1: a perfect day to start a challenge

wow. it was just great. my day at the spa was lovely, although the treatments left something to be desired. i get better massages from wayne and audra and edy! but the setting was lovely and i just sat by the pool the rest of the time and got just enough sun to be just a little pink! and then, as i said i would, i went to the mall and bought myself some running shoes, and then i went to target and bought some running shorts, and then i went to the asian market and bought TWO FRESH DURIAN!!! not frozen, totally fresh! (they smell so good. it cracks me up to be in the nasty, fish-stinky asian market and to have people there tell me that DURIAN stinks! lol! durian smells good compared to nasty rotting fish carcasses.) and then i came home, and put on my new running shoes, and went out for a run! it was hotter than hell-fire and hades out there, so i didn't do much, but at least i got some movement going.

today was one of those rare days in which you accomplish exactly everything you set out to do. very satisfying.

and of course i was 100% 811! it's the first day of the challenge!